The Tree of Me

There are mistakes that I have made.

Like a giant and ever growing tree,
whose roots are my roots,
whose trunk is my me,
whose outstretched forked branches show me
where I went wrong in the outcomes of ‘coulds’ and ‘dids’

Some of the branches are gnarled and barren, and I fear
they would not take my weight;
they end in skeletal fingertips that tsk an Ah-ah-ahhhh! at the past;
This was a did that should not have been done.

Some of the branches end in an escapade of colors, an ebullience
of effervescence that says You have chosen….wisely.
That was a could that I did when I should.

Gurus & geishas & grapplers have all offered advice about your past:
dissolve it, embrace it, let it go, ignore it, forget it…
Me? Me, I want to pluck some of those brilliantly hued leaves off
and make some fucking tea, read the story in the leaves,
and figure out how I got some of these things so very right,
and some of these things oh, so very wrong.

There are mistakes that I have made.

I want to lie in the fork of a wrong turning and mourn,
weep over what could have been, and wallow in the hurt that was.

Then, when I climb upwards and reach for the next limb,
I will know to go right instead of left, and I will understand why.

There are mistakes that I have made, that I do not intend to make again.

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Categories: Non-Fiction Nonsense, Poetry | Tags: | 8 Comments

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8 thoughts on “The Tree of Me

  1. Just brilliant, kid. Every idea, every nuance, every last damned word. I’m so glad you’re back.

  2. “This was a did that should not have been done.”

    Now that’s what I call poetry.

    • Ha, well thank you πŸ˜‰ It’s kind of fun to read that line out loud, cos it sorta sounds ridiculous but I love it anyway

  3. E.W. Storch

    “Then, when I climb upwards and reach for the next limb,
    I will know to go right instead of left, and I will understand why”

    Yeah, but then you’ll have a lopsided and ugly tree. We’re meant to make mistakes so that our trees are full and round and beautiful.

    • Ha, not every fork would go right to be ‘correct’, but my underlying theme is that there are SOME mistakes I’ve made that I really don’t want to make again. Others, I’m quite sure I’ll repeat til my ashes swirl into the ether πŸ˜‰

  4. Wonderful word choices. I especially loved this phrase, “an escapade of colors.” Such vivid imagery.

    • Ha, I actually pictured colors exploding like a Disney On Ice production πŸ˜‰ Thanks so much, that means a lot to me coming from you.

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