Cleansing Fire

Midnight hair and lantern jaw, gentle in speech if not appearance, he spread his hands wide and, reaching them towards the bonfire, spoke an unbinding spell.

'What once was ours
Is now yours, and mine.
I release you from your vows.'

Tendrils crept out from the ring of stones, smoke snakes curling through the grass to encircle her ankles. She made a little moue of distaste and visibly stopped herself from stepping back and shaking them off. Interrupting the ritual now would nullify everything they'd already done.

He was sad, though not heart-broken. This was his fault; he had mistaken rigidity for strength. While strength was malleable and capable of spontaneity, rigidity snapped like a thawing icicle at the slightest provocation.

Better to start his search from scratch than to cross the finish line with the wrong partner. Through the clarity of retrospect, the obvious conclusion surfaced: things don't always turn out as planned.

***

I've wanted to try the Speakeasy for a while now, having read about it on Suzanne's blog http://lucidedit.wordpress.com/ and because I really love the name Speakeasy and its connotations. So, here's my first attempt, and now I'm going to go read the other link-ups for inspiration to get better because so far the writing I've seen here is way above par.

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Categories: Fiction | Tags: , , | 27 Comments

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27 thoughts on “Cleansing Fire

  1. ‘Tis better to have loved and lost, as they say…

  2. E.W. Storch

    Mad props for “moue.” 😉

    • I do not wish your angry stage leavings, sir! Unless by mad you mean insane, a candelabra, like Lumiere, perhaps?
      The less sleep I get, the more I find my own stupidity hilarious 😉 Thank you for whatever kind of props you want to give me – I do love that word, I think it’s a damn near perfect descriptive.

  3. ohh spooky! interesting imagery!

  4. Love the distinction between strength and rigidity, and how on that point, he decided to move on. Though I’m curious as to what his finish line is, not doing doesn’t detract from the story a bit. I’m glad you decided to link up – I enjoyed this story!

    • Ha, well, as to his finish line I can’t exactly say – but I may try to write it so that I can figure it out 😉 It was one of those little tales where you can see the people / situation, but you just get a little slice of it and then it goes quiet on you.

  5. Ooh, this is so intriguing! I want to know more. Love that you used moue – and that opening line description is fantastic! I’m so glad you joined us! 🙂

  6. I want to read more of this story!

  7. I’m with Suzanne! This was a wonderful read for all the reasons she said. Welcome to the speakeasy! We hope you will keep coming back!

  8. I enjoyed reading your story.

  9. I was intrigued from the start. This pulled me in, and those fingers of whispering smoke ensnared my senses. Awesome!

  10. Short with a bitter-sweet angle-a great debut on SE and I loved the lines,”While strength was malleable and capable of spontaneity, rigidity snapped like a thawing icicle at the slightest provocation..”Look forward to reading more from you in the coming week(s) 🙂

  11. Christine

    I’m with Suzanne – the opening totally drew me in, and I want to know more. What was their bond, exactly?? I hope you write more. Thanks for posting, and welcome to the speakeasy!

    • I would like to give another installment a shot, so figuring out exactly what their bond is is a perfect direction, thanks 🙂

  12. Pingback: winners of the speakeasy at yeah write #154 | the speakeasy at yeah write

  13. The literary devices used in the first half of this were spellbinding. I really enjoyed this read.
    k~

  14. I loved reading your words… how many people use ‘moue’? This was ‘poetry in motion’ as they say.

    On another note: Suzanne is to blame for me being at the Speakeasy too… isn’t she wonderful?

    • Ha, I really love the connotations of that word, and was excited to have an opportunity to use it. I’m very glad you enjoyed reading it, and thank you. Suzanne is awesome, from her vocabulary series to poetry and prose, it’s a little ridiculous 😉

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